Thursday, December 20, 2007

Dear Santa,

I hope all is well and you aren't too stressed out YET. My last letter to you was a wish list for others. This one is alllll about me. As I've said before, I've been pretty good this year. So if you're still using the whole naughty or nice barometer, I believe I fall closer to nice. (Yes, Santa, I've been naughty on a few occasions but it was requested so I believe that honoring that request was indeed nice! hahahahahaha)

So the following is a list of what I want for Christmas:

A laptop. Santa, this is more of a need than a want. I would totally be finished my book by now if I had a laptop. I get sooo bored sitting in my big leather computer chair at this big desk writing. I am a social writer. I need to be out and about to feed my creativity. I am that chick parked at a table in Starbucks with a Venti skim sugar free cinnamon dolce latte no whip, writing until my brain is drained from its caffeine fueled high. I'm that woman with books of photographs scattered around the universe of my writing at the library, pulling visual inspiration from the pictures around me. Yes, I could go out and buy said laptop but a gift from you or one of your loving elves is sooooo......inexpensive. For me, of course.

A Starbucks gift card. Santa, everyone knows that I am totally addicted to Starbucks. Especially now in this cold, heartless weather condition we called winter. So why not feed my addiction? It's not like it's crack. Its a coffee beverage and only 160 calories for a Venti skim sugar free cinnamon dolce latte with no whip cream. And it would be a perfect companion to the laptop, so my writing experience at Starbucks would be completely gratis. For me, of course.

Underwear. Ok, Santa, I'm sorry to make you blush. But here's the deal, you know I've lost over 35 pounds this year, and you've seen all the clothes I've given away. Nothing fits and that includes the undies, especially the cute stuff. I need new cute Vicki's Secret sets. Wait, scratch that. Not cute as in stripes and polka dots and little girl patterns. Cute as in sexy, hot, steamy, seductive (and still comfortable. Have you ever walked around with a pearl g-string on all day, Santa??? Probably not.) Since you don't know my size, a gift card from Victoria's Secret will do (Sidebar: If it's on my body, how is it Victoria's Secret?? Isn't it my secret??? My name isn't Victoria. Annnd, with those bright pink bags, stores in every shopping area, and commercials on regular TV 1,000 times a day, how is this place still a Secret????). Plus, I don't want any beef from Mrs. Claus when you bring home bra and panty sets in my size and not hers. And yes, Santa, this is gift is for me. Of course. And maybe for another set of eyes. But primarily for me. hahahahaaa

A literary agent and publisher. I understand, you can't place these people under my tree on Christmas Day because of kidnapping and unlawful imprisonment laws. But Santa, a multi-book deal and the people to make it happen would be greatly appreciated. I will even shout you out in the Acknowledgements of the first book to show my gratitude and to prove once and for all that you really do exist. Who needs a Miracle on 34th Street???

A vacation. Santa, I'm in desperate need of a vacation. Somewhere hot, sunny, tropical, and fun. Somewhere that I can relax on the beach for a couple of hours daily. Somewhere that I can have adventurous fun. Somewhere that I can experience local culture and learn something new about the people and about myself. Somewhere that will fill the memory card for my camera with amazing pictures. Somewhere that I can take my laptop and write of the experience until my heart is content or until I pass out - whatever comes first. hahahaha

More. Santa, yes, I want more. More time with my loved ones. More fodder for this blog. More trust in myself. More opportunities to leave my footprint on this world. More money. More decisions to make. More steps in the right direction. More passion.

No mo'. On the flip side, Santa, I want no mo'. No mo' drama. No mo' excuses. No mo' negativity. I've learned all I needed from these experiences. So instead of taking the drama, the negativity, and the excuses with me, how about I just take the lessons learned and nothing else??? It will make my laptop bag soo much lighter to carry.

Santa, I know you have sooo many other letters to read and requests to honor or dishonor. But thank you for reading mine. Oh, and my mother got a 92 on her final so she will definitely remain on the Dean's Lists. Thanks again, Santa!!



rashad said...

If Santa gives you an agent and a publisher, tell him to send one my way between xmas and jan 20th(my birthday).okthanksbuhbye

E-Boogie said...

2008 will be a very very VERY good year for YOU! Stay focused and diligent in your talents and gifts and never EVER stop believing (this is the part where you close your eyes and click your heels three times!).

And then I'll be the first to say "I told you so!"