Tuesday, November 14, 2006

I need to vent today. So please forgive me if I sound like a bitch. I actually feel like being a bitch today so here it is:

Have you ever wondered why you are friends with some people? Wondered what purpose do they serve in your life? I often refer to my friends as beautiful precious gems which adorn my life. However, lately a few feel like QVC diamonelles glued on the fabric of my life. I know that friendships are meant to test your strengths but damn how much can a sister take.
I have a friend who feels like its her divine right to comment on every aspect of my life. Do I ask for her opinion? Nope. I swear sometimes I just want to kick that damn soapbox out from under her. She preaches more than a minister on double collection Sunday. I'm not saying that my life is perfect but damn I never hired her as a life inspector. She is supposed to be my friend not my warden. But at the end of the day, she's my friend.
Then I have another friend who is so caught up in the materialistic and superficial elements of life. Her life plays out like a video on BET. It's all about men, money and how to separate the 2. Damn that sounds harsh but what I probably mean to say is that she wants to lead the "glamorous life" - beautiful clothes, exquisite jewelry, etc. But just like the song says "without love it aint much". I pass no judgments on her and her lifestyle but it bothers me that we can never have a deep meaningful conversation. I can never call her up just to talk about everything and nothing all at the same time. But she's my friend.
Now this next friend. Well this is difficult to say without sounding petty or paranoid. But every guy I have ever expressed interest in in her presence, she hits on them. It has happened enough that it has become a pattern. I should not have to hold back with my friends but with this friend I find myself censoring myself when we are out. I should be able to say to my girl, "Oh girl that guy over there in the white shirt?? He can get it!!!" without her being the one who runs over to get it. Now, if I see a guy I like, I express interest in the not so attractive guy at the other end of the bar. Again, despite it all she's my friend.

I am no closer to figuring out why these women along with a few others are still my friends. Some may read this and think that I allow them to walk all over me. Hell no. I embrace these friendships. They allow me to see aspects of life that I never want to incorporate into my own. I pride myself in finding the good in most people. (some of you fuckers out there the good is long gone and I gave up looking! LOL). I accept them all - good and bad. Whatever it is they bring something to my life that no one else has brought. Maybe these QVC diamonelles are there to accentuate the authenticity and beauty of my true gems. But you bitches sure do bring out the bitch in me. Thanks ladies! I needed that!

Oh and don't call me with your guess on who is who. I will hang up on your ass. And if you think it's you....well, you have some soul searching to do. Not a judgment, just an observation.

1 comment:

rashad said...

who are my 3 favorite bloggers:
janelle
janelle
janelle
why? because she spits hot fi-yah!
I like this kind of blog, but not because I am some dude who craves drama. But because it is just raw emotion that you need sometimes. A wise woman once told me that your friends, particularly the long term ones, represent who you were at one point in your life. So you may have outgrown some of them, but you've never gotten around to sweeping them out of your life, so they hang around. perhaps its time you did some spring cleaning...although this blog may very well have done that for you..

either way your true friends will see this, probably call out a few of YOUR flaws, and then you all will stay friends. as you read this though, keep in mind that I have very few good friends..hahaha