"As I sit back, relax, steam a blunt, sip a Becks......" Ok, so I'm not Biggie and they aren't many R&B singers that I want to give the business to (damn, I wonder if Chris Webber can sing??? LOL). But as I load my Ipod (still loving it!!!) with a gazillion songs there are certain songs that are movies in my head. The moment I hear them my mind instantly rewinds back to a moment in my life. As the song plays, I watch the movie of my memory and honor whatever emotion the song/movie evokes. Some I wish I could freeze frame and live right in that moment again; others I want the song to hurry up and end because its accompanying memory is still too painful to bear no matter how distant the memory was supposed to be.

Kissing You by Total. We walked hand in hand down the streets of New York City on a typical but beautiful sunny summer day. I talked, he listened. He talked, I listened. Smiles and laughter ever present. Our first date was full of butterflies, nervous energy flying all around. As conversation flowed as easy and steady as our stroll down the street, suddenly he stopped me, right in the middle of the sidewalk. I turned my body slightly toward him to inquire why we were stopping. He cupped my face, with his middle fingers behind my ears and his thumbs caressing my sun-flushed cheeks. Before I could fully wonder , "what the helllll??", he simply and quietly proclaimed " I have to kiss you". As just like that, his lips gently grazed mine and as if on cue, all I heard in my head was " Kissing you is all that I've been thinkin' of/Kissing you is ooooh, oooh". It was as if someone pressed play on the cd player in my head (didn't own my beloved Ipod yet). As the kiss got deeper, the music got louder and the constant roar of the city faded to a background purr. I have no idea how long that first of many, many kisses that day lasted. Whenever we stopped this very public display of sweet affection, we stood there for a moment, face to face, grinning like two 5 year olds with big plans for the dollar in our pockets. Then without missing a beat, we resumed our city stroll, hand in hand. I talked, he listened. He talked, I listened. Smiles and laughter ever present. I couldn't help but wonder (still wonder, actually) why that song?? It was most likely a decade old and it had been a minute since I last heard it. But his lips on mine was all I need to hear it its soft melody in my head.

Square Biz - Teena Marie. I'm sitting on the edge of the bed, legs swinging in time with the song, watching the scene in front of me. " I wanna go. Can I go witchu?" "No, you're too young to go to Bentley's." She replied as she wiggled her booty into her skin tight Sergio Valente jeans, perfect Farrah Fawcett flips flapping up and down right along with her. That made me giggle. I slide down off the bed until my footie-pajama feet touch the floor. Hand on hips, "But I'm five. I can go!!! Pleeeeeeeeeeeeaase" I start singing along "I told you square bits to the baaabay. Square square bits. I talkin love dabit dabit square bits." This makes her friends, sitting on the other twin bed across from me giggle. I pout. "I'm telling Granny you won't let me go!". storming out of the room, knowing she was gonna get in trouble with my great-grandmother for not taking me with her. Why wouldn't she get in trouble? She always got in trouble for not wanting to take my very inquisitive ( and could remember everything we did) behind with her and her teenage friends. Guess who got a beating for being up past her bedtime?? Back then (before I knew any better), I thought my 17 year old aunt was the coolest person in the universe, the galaxy even. Her clothes were always funky fresh, and she had the dopest boyfriend, Calvin (sigh,my first crush..lol)

What is it about music that triggers a connection within?? I don't just listen to music; I've lived it. It apparently serves as the soundtrack to my memories. It's as if the music travels from my ears and reaches down into the bag of memories in my soul and inexplicable attaches itself to a movie frame in my life, and refuses to let go. They are intricately intertwined and the connection to my soul is made. One day, I can only pray my writing touches my audience the way these songs touch me. But in the meantime, I will continue to press play and relish in the memories(good, bad, sad...whatever) music is bringing to the forefront of my mind.