Thursday, July 19, 2007

Okay I had no intention of posting another blog this quickly about dating but this one has me stumped. I will most likely ramble and you probably won't even like this post but I need some clarity and you guys know I always feel much better after I get shit off my chest, my heart, and my brain. Maybe once I get it all out, I can make better sense out of the situation. Or maybe my readers will actually comment and leave feedback. Well my readers besides Rashad. He is consistent and loyal. He reads AND comments on every blog. He's the best, supreme, and after I shitted on the bitch....... (sorry inside joke. Rashad, stop laughing! LOL).

Okay heeeere we go........ (gotta say it like Slick Rick in "A Children's Story" for full effect. LOL)

Once upon a time, not long ago.....
I met this guy. Let's call him Text. Text because our sole means of communication is via text (duh!). I can count on one hand how many times I have spoken to him on the phone over the past month or so. Text and I "speak" daily via text or IM. The difference between Text and Hustle and Suit (damn this sounds like the title of an Outkast song...LOL) is that Hustle and Suit actually pick up the phone, and our phone conversations last longer than 2 minutes (actually, checked my call log for this one. LOL). So after a couple of weeks of text messaged convo, Text decides he wants to see me. The night in question we both had plans but agreed to meet at an outdoor bar prior to our other commitments. I meet him at the bar, all is good (yeah I was 15 minutes late. told you I'm working on it..LOL). We are laughing and joking, good times all around. He asked what I was drinking, I said water. He asked why. I told him I didn't feel like it because it was really humid outside and I wasn't feeling all that great (truth). He asked the bartender to bring me a glass of water. The bartender brings over a bottled water. He didn't blink, everything is cool. He had 2 drinks over the duration of our mini-date. So our mini-date ends. He pays the tab. He goes his way and I go mine. The evening doesn't end without (of course!!) a text message conversation.

Second time I saw him he picked up some Caribbean food for me (which I love), and we just hung out, talking (more like debating the finer points of life). So by now we have gone back and forth over text messaging about when we are going to see each other again for a third time. Finally he "says" to me: "Its ur date so u plan it. I respond " I don't know what u want to do. whatever is cool w/ me" He tells me that he recently got his ass kicked in bowling and could use the practice. I tell him that there is a really nice bowling alley here in Harlem, black owned (right fist in the air for my people!! LOL). He asked do they serve drinks. I tell him about their bar and lounge on the second floor (should I have questioned whether he was an alcoholic or if he was trying to get me drunk??? lol). He then asked "are you going to feed me?" Now, I thought this was odd but then I thought about the delicious jerk chicken he bought for me, and replied "surrrre, they hv food @ the bowling alley." Because of a hectic schedule on my end right now, I couldn't set a date until today for this bowling date. I texted (is this a word?? LOL) him today " what day next wk is ok 4 u 2 go bowling?" His response: "u want 2 take me bowling on friday??" Take him bowling??? "ummmm ur taking ME bowling. friday is good 4 me." He then unleashes a text tirade telling me that I said I was taking him bowling and apparently the plan was a farce because it appears that I don't want to see him. And he doesn't like the games I'm playing. Huh??? Games?? What the hell did I miss here???

Okay here are my arguments on this case:
1. Dude has yet to take me out on a "official first date". Meeting for a drink to kill time does not a date make. And your honor, may I clearly point out I had a bottled water while he consumed 2 alcoholic beverages. Now he may count bringing me something to eat as a date but damn, can I sit in a restaurant??? Can you eat with me and share conversation between bites??? Can you stare into my beautiful brown eyes across the table and compliment me at least once (am I asking for too much? NOT! LOL)????

2. It was his damn idea to go bowling. No, he didn't say " I want to go bowling." but he put the suggestion out there and I happen to know a venue to facilitate the activity. So if this was his idea why am I expected to be his Suga Mama for the night??

3. Okay I know this is going to sound really shallow and bourgie, and stuckup but fuck it:
Bowling: $8 per game + $4 shoe rental, each per person. And lets say we bowl 2 games.
Drinks: $40, for 2 rounds (but if he's an alcoholic for real this could easily double).
Can't forget about food: approximately $20-$30 for 2 people to dine on bowling food.

Dude spent $4 for bottled water and I would say approximately $8-$9 on the jerk chicken.

So how is it that he spends less than 20 bucks on me (I'm not counting his 2 drinks. He drank them, not me!!! LOL) and I am expected to pay at least 100 freaking dollars on a guy that has yet to take me out on a real date??? Can someone out there help me??? Am I wrong in my assessment of the situation? Have the rules changed that drastically in the dating world? If so, was someone supposed to send me a memo or an email 9or in this case a text message...LOL), something before I curse this dude out??? Which by the way I haven't. I live up to my bourgie roots and responded: "it seems we hv a misunderstanding. call me later 2 discuss." This was 6 hours ago and Text has yet to call. If he doesn't call and texts me instead, I doubt I'll respond. My thumbs are tired.

Goodnite! Knock 'em out the box, Rick. Knock 'em out, Rick. Knock 'em out the box, Rick.

3 comments:

rashad said...

Text sounds suspiciously like the Thurgood character from Chappelle's Half Baked. I think you may need to cut him from the team..

Michell said...

I have to agree with Rashad on this one. Text sounds a little suspicious. However, sometimes it's hard get the tone of the conversation via a text message or email - maybe he was just joking (shrug). And I think guys now count dates by how much effort they expend (which wasn't a lot by what you wrote) and not by how much they spend. But I definitely feel you on this one, the two first "encounters" don't count as dates. You could also offer to go dutch on the bowling "date"!?

Evelyn said...

Fuck him, girl!!! (and not in the good way, either).
He is at best a punk, at worst a pussy and a punk.
I hate a dude that won't pay for shit making demands - ugh!
Did I ever tell you about the dude I went out with who had the AUDACITY to ask me for his money back after a date cause I woudln't give him any? And he ate the food he paid for???
Tell him to man up.